Imagine wanting something so bad……getting it……then LOSING it! Imagine the doctors telling you in order for you to have what you really want you have to take several pills and go through several tests….only to find out it isn’t working either. Imagine being told you can’t have children at all! This is my story of Faith and Endurance. My husband and I were extremely happy when I became pregnant in 2007. We told our families in excitement not knowing I would have a miscarriage two months later. I was heartbroken and I became depressed. I didn’t want to speak to anyone, not even my husband at times. We tried for years to get pregnant and it seemed it wasn’t going to happen. Several years had passed and still nothing. I felt like God was torturing me because everywhere I went I saw babies……not just one or two…..but at times it felt like hundreds! I didn’t want to go anywhere. In the meantime, God was working on me. I went through a lot. In 2009 there were at least 8-10 people I knew who were pregnant. All while I was waiting on God’s promise to me. At the end of 2010 into the beginning of 2011, I was taking several infertility medications and they were not working. By March of 2011, I stopped because I just couldn’t take it anymore. At this point, God told me I had to go through this, just to let me know He was in control. He then proceeded to tell me to adopt and I broke down crying at my desk saying: “But you are God, and You can do ANYTHING, why not just give me my own child.” Needless to say my husband and I struggled with this. We went back and forth and finally in September of 2011 we told God if that’s what you want then fine, we surrender! We found an adoption agency, went through the paperwork, applied for help, because it’s expensive to adopt a child. Only to find out, we were not approved. At this point, I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t even tell my husband. I wasn’t mad at God; I just couldn’t understand why He would tell us to do that and it not work. Lo and behold I was sitting in Bible study November 22, 2011, and all I heard was go and get a pregnancy test. I thought I was tripping, having one of my many moments about conceiving a child. Well, I heard it two more times. So I said, ok God I’m going to buy a pregnancy test, but if it’s negative, I’m not telling my husband! I left Bible Study and went to Walgreens got my test and then went to Papa Johns to grab a pizza. I got home, said hello to my husband, and went straight to the restroom. I took the test, waited, and before the 3 minutes were up, there were two lines and I sat there in shock and began to cry, thanking God for keeping His promise. Afterwards, I ran in my bedroom and showed it to my husband and all he said was “I hope you’re not joking!”, and I said “I’m not!” We cried in each other’s arms thanking God for what He had done. Now we have a beautiful Baby boy named Zackery Josiah Green. Zackery means God has remembered and Josiah means God will save. He was born July 27, 2012. God is truly a promise keeper!!! What I’ll leave with you all is this…..NEVER be ashamed of trusting God’s word!
Author,
Shantá Green
